AUTUMN, THE 1ST WEEK

1. In Miami we have no fall. As in the north, leaves don't turn into an explosion of colors. But we have a very wet season: beginning September we have an increased amount of rainfall, and if it's our luck one hurricane will at least make a landfall. Which means this time of the year, in Miami we have fall.

2. I got new books. There's a certain hint of gloom in the air that makes up for a perfect moment of reading, and the bookstores probably try to capitalize on this phenomena by bringing up a fall (!) in prizes. With 30% discount, I got "13 Moons" and "The Inheritance of Loss" from Borders, my favorite neighborhood bookstore. I also started reading Philip Roth's "The Human Stain" and John Cheever's "Bullet Park".

3. Or maybe it's just me; I feel the gloom.

4. Nights are getting longer. The temperature is beginning to drop. Humidity is dissipating. Who needs an explosion of colors?

5. There are other great things I like about fall: the good movies are coming out, and come November, The Miami International Book Fair!

6. "I saw old Autumn in the misty morn
Stand shadowless like silence, listening
To silence." Thomas Hood, Ode: Autumn.

7. That's fall, folks.

OPEN LETTER #2

Dear Jet,

We haven't written each other for a long time and the interrupted traffic of correspondence made me realize, somehow, for one shining moment, how silence can be a tad boring. I may not be able to fully explain this to the accidental reader stumbling upon this openness for the first time but I might as well announce how your letters (or blog comments, or emails) magically carry the magnetic kernels of your speech - or how your written words make your readers listeners at the same time. And so as I was reeling at this silence I decided to make the rounds, and the rounds opted to deliver some heartbreaking news to me.

I don't know what to say. I feel a little insignificant to the quietude of my surroundings that I hesitated to deliver a preponderance of q's even to the most responsible of responder, what gives? where is she? anything wrong?

Silence has a way of telling.

I am sorry for the loss, even if by its immeasure my sorrow falters. Yet I am armed by the words of Simone Weil which, in our sometimes sullen ways of remembering the things of the past, was wise to advise: Distance is the soul of beauty.

Always keep that faith, my friend. And that laughter, that vibrant beauty of your being. Big bro is up on his wings and, like a good wine, always ready to liberate us from the burdens of the past.

Sincerely,
c
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Double dose: I looked at my old emails and I saw this one I sent you years ago. Maybe, just maybe, this is not part of the burdensome past, but I thought you may want to read this a second time...

dear jet,

once upon a time i read a story entitled a general in the library,
written by the italian fabulist italo calvino. reading that story
about a general and his men whose eyes and minds were awakened by the
books they read was probably comparable to myself dreaming about
myself dreaming. no, i am not a general, though i belong for the most part of my life to the general public.

so the story goes this way: there was this nation called panduria
that was militarized, with most of the country's budget going to
military spending. since they were the military, it follows that they were paranoid (which military is not?), so paranoid in fact that one time they suspected that there were books published that say something terribly bad against them. and so they staked out in the library, with their full regiment as if going to war, and they pored over the books day in and day out.

these miliray men were a bunch of idiots (which military men are not?) and one of them started screaming while reading the historical Punic Wars and finding some bad things said about the Romans (the Pandurians considered themselved decsendants of Romans). the idiot started screaming 'this is outrageous! this must be reported at once!
but the more they read, the less idiot they become, and one time in
their stakeout they were craving to go out of the library and go back
to the real world, armed now with fresh eyes and minds to face
reality. in their words, they were ready to face life again!

i am a pandurian in reverse. from the outside world, i go into the
world of books because the reality of life has bored me to death.
everywhere i go, everytime i look, all i see are the same typical
things that a typical man typically do. but in the world of books,
the general rule is that nothing is typical, it is not what it seems
to be.

friendship, in a way, is like literature, and the strongest
resemblance is that to both you do not say 'i've had enough'. friends are like books: they tell you stories with twists, they disappoint you with their plot, they make you cry, they scare you out of your wits, they provide you with enough tension, they enlighten you - but always in the end, they make you think.

one good thing about friendship is that you find it in a space that
cannot be fully qualified or described. it is somewhere between an
acquaintance and a lover that is in a level all its own, sometimes
rising above the rest because - I now speak for myself - there is no
such thing as selfishness in friendship. after all, can you find
anything more selfless than in making somebody think? think about it.
(hah, did i trap you there?)

so there. rise above the crowd, you miss jolly ole jet. i'll be
blatant. you are my friend because you always make me think.

love and prayers,
c

24 ORAS

Naalala ko yung libro na binasa ko nung high school (which means, uhm, matagal na sha), One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich ni Alexandr S, tungkol sa buhay ni Ivan (shempre) sa loob ng 24 oras (shempre ulet) sa piitan dahil lamang sa pag-defame kay Stalin.

Hayup. Si Kiefer Sutherland nga katakut-takot ang tinepok at tinorture sa loob ng 24 oras, bihira lang makulong. Sabi nga nung isang tunay na autoridad, kung totoong ahente ng gubyerno ang papel ni Kiefer, isa na syang kriminal. Kaso si Jobert tipo si Nina. At chaka tipo ko si Kim. E di stepdad ko pala si Jobert. Ha-ha-ha-yup!

Teka, ano ba 24 oras ko?

Nag-jogging ako pagkauwi ng condo kagabi. Sa pagtakbo ko nakatapak ako ng butiki. tsk, tsk, tsk, sayang na butiki.

Tas kain ako ng sushi sa isang sushihan (shempre), pinuno ko ang tyan ko ng o-toro (yung oiliest part ng tuna o salmon na shang pinakamasarap). Kung ako siguro ang kakainin ng mga cannibals, lalafangin muna nila ang mukha ko. That is my o-toro, ne'? Unless sabihin ng tarantadong cannibal, this face is so ugly, ne? Tas sasabihin nung kakosa nya, You, idiot, that's his ass!

Tas derecho akong Borders kasi gusto ko bilin yung 3 libro (3 for the price of 2, galeeeeengg), 13 moons ni Charles Frazier, Lay of the Land ni Richard Ford, tsaka Runaway ni Alice Munro, kaso tumawag yung kamag-anak ko na may ibibigay daw na isang sakong libro, puro hardbound pa tsaka bago. Nayko.

Di ko gaanong tipo yung mga binibigay ni K na libro. Kadalasan tungkol sa medisina (doktor kasi sha, psychiatrist, kaya nung minsang nagkukuwentuhan kami at meron akong nabanggit na bagay, sabi nya, Are you crazy?, napag-isip ko kung expression lang ba nya yun o dinaiagnose na nya ako.

Labo.

Manonood ako mamya ng 3:10 to Yuma.

Yehey.

ANO SA ENGLISH ANG SAN DIEGO?

Saint Jigow? Saint Die, Go? Saint Elsewhere? South of L.A.?

Mexicano siguro si Diego, tas mabait sha nung nabubuhay. Wala pa sigurong border patrol nun, tsaka di pa nadidiskubre ni Eric Clapton ang kokeyn.

Sabi dun sa travel book na binasa ko bago magtungong SD, pag may kumat daw sa yo sa highway habang nagmamaneho ka, wag mo daw potpotan o ngatngatan at hayaan na lang kasi baka mga myembro sila ng kung anong gang(grene) at pag nagkataon e baka halibasin ka nila ng nachos sa ulo, nakow kung ganun sila e malamang supalpalin ko sila ng tacos sa muka, tas pipigain ko ung katas ng jalapeno sa mata nila habang pinapasak ko yung burrito sa ilong nila at mamasilyahin ko ang tenga nila ng sangkatutak na tamales. Kaya ayun, nung papunta na kaming Escondido ni Inang at may kumat sa akin, ahehe, tumahimik na lang ako, ewan ko ba.

Nung unang araw namin sa SD matapos mag-check in sa Westgate Hotel sa Gaslamp Quarter (downtown), naglakad kami papunta sa Fish Market. E shempre si Inang e medyo iika-ika at me kalayuan pala ang restaurant, tas habang naglalakad kami, me tumigil na pedicab. Ayus. Akala ko nasa Cubao ako, josme, sa gitna ng downtown, kabi-kabila ang sasakyan, tas ayun at bumabyahe kami ng pedicab at kumakaway pa ako sa mga tao na parang si Santo Papa.

Fish Market: 2 stars

Merong malaking barkong nakadaong sa SD Bay na madadaanan patungong Fish Market, yung out-of-commission-already na navy ship baga, tas ginawa na lang na parang tacky tourist spot at me restaurant pa. Ano ba ang tacky sa espanyol? Jolog?

Yung pinagkalayu-layo ng nilakad namin, ang masarap na pagkain pala e matatagpuan lang dun sa Horton Place mall na katapat lang ng hotel namin. Nung gabi, inisa-isa ko yung stall sa food court, aha! natagpuan ko yung Royal India na tipong masarap ang dating, order ako ng chicken tanduri, chicken masala, mga ginayat-gayat na veg na parang laing, tsaka kaning naguumapaw sa curry, to go, di lalampas sa $12.00. tas nung nasa lobby na ako ng hotel na sobrang elegante ang dating na tipong naglalakihan ang chandeliers tas mero pang naghaharp at ang mga tao e galanteng nagsisipagkape at nagwa-wine ang cheese kuning habang nanood ng performance, mejo napatingin yung mga sosi sa akin kasi nangangalingasaw yung dala kong pagkain
na bumalot sa buong looby, mahabaging langit ng Calcutta, takbo ako sa elevator na puno pa mandin ng tao, tas tanong nung isa sa akin, Hmmm smells good, where did you get that?, sabi ko, from India.

Kinaumagahan, kontes kami ni inay sa pag-utot. Moral lesson: hinay2 lang sa curry.

Royal India: 4 stars.

Tas nun punta na kami sa reunion sa escondido, at pauwi kontik na akong maligaw, nakita ko na lang yung malaking sign: International Border, 12 miles. Nayko.

Tas the following days ahead e ginalugad na namin ni Inang ang SD, SD zoo, Balboa Park, Old Town, Coronado, Little Italy, Embarcadero tsaka La Jolla at Torrey Pines.

Tanong: Anong 2 Andrew ang nambulabog sa Miami?
Sagot: Hurricane Andrew, tsaka si Andrew Cunanan.

Naalala ko lang si Andrew C kasi taga-La Jolla sha.

Sa paggalugad namin sa SD, napansin ko na andami sa mga city parks e me nagco-concert. Yumpala, kondisyones ng mga nag-donate ng private lands na kailangan me libreng concert tuwing week-ends. Wagi. Yung katabing subdivision namin sa Pinas, ang designated na park nila e sinab-divide pa rin at binenta sa mga tao. Giwa.

Eclectic ang SD. Nachempo pa na may convention ang mga kartunista from all over the country kaya andaming nagkalat na eccentric na tao sa kalye na mukang cartoon characters. Tas may banners sa paligid "Comic Con", ayus, naalala ko tuloy ang mga bayani ko na sina Larry Alcala at Nonoy Marcelo. At Carlo Caparas (jokz).

Bago kami bumatsi pabalik ng Miami, sabi ko kay Inang iti-treat ko sya sa Croce's (pag-aari ng byuda ni Jim croce), sabi nya Hoy3, ikuha mo na lang ako ulit ng Chicken Tanduri. Sabi ko dun sa server, Boss tsip Mahabharata, wag mo naman sir mashadong sapawan ng curry ung kanin. Mahirap na, pag-uwi namin pabalik ng Miami, baka magkontes kami ulit ni Inang sa eroplano at magtalunan yung mga pasahero as they look forward to their quicker, swifter, less painful deaths.

Eclectic, Perfect-weathered, Musically-inclined, Culturally-active San Diego: 5 stars.