Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot.
- Mark Twain
Kickoff Notice, The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn

E.B. Wan Kenobi & the Council of Superheroes
Finally, Finale', the Finagle

Where: 50th floor, The Lectern
When: 8:30 pm, same date as scene one
Who: Freude & Jobert
Why: I don't know
How: to love him
What: to do, how to move him

I've been changed, yes really changed
In this past few days when I've seen myself
I seem like someone else

The original scene: We see Freude sitting on the floor of the veranda, in lotus position, feet entangled in a web of deception, in and out of a loop like a boy scout knot or a girl scout pretzel; later he may realize the kind of mess his feet are in, but that's another story, let's not give this boy a hard time, he is a nice young fellow believe me, ask all the readers who he makes happy days and nights with his insightful dose of wisdom and crippettycrap, there's treasure in those words if you only knew how to find it, a hidden treasure in the most secretive way, and that's why the identity of this lad is the world's biggest secret since the useful function of the fart, from the birth of the internet to the moment I type this people scamper to find out who Schandenfreude is, is he some malingerer from U.P.?, or some guy with ties to gemeinschaft? an expert on Graham Green literature? ah, we don't know, do we, so what do we do?, we call the one who might know, the one with the third eye and second nose and fourth wrinkle and first dimple, the god of the ether, of the unknown space between your computer and mine, EB Wan Kenobi himself, Sir Jobert of San Francisco now of Paranaque, the idol of two young girls and one old man, the latter being myself, a useless playwright who could never give justice to the nobility of these superheroes.

Freude: Ahhhh, I am blinded by the light, stop, turn off the light, I can't see!
light man: Wake up kid, it's too early to sleep, the night is young and lovers cannot see, I mean love is blind and, no, uh...home sweet home, gee, that's not it, momeeee!!!
Freude: Wait, I think I know you, master, yesyo, master Obi Wan Kenobi from George Lucas' Star Wars, aren't you the great Jedi knight?
light man: Close but not quite. With apologies to George, I am EB Wan Kenobi, not created by George but by Jet's nephew Lucas, and due to his lineage, I am not the Jedi knight but the great Dejay Knight.
Freude: Whoa, master (bowing 3 times: bow, bow, bow) ...but you look familiar to me, I have seen you on tv, yesyo, you are my Sir Jobert, eh, am I back in your good graces, sir?
Jobert: But you never left boy, you never left. (Jobert to cbs: "hmmm, some people really don't seem to grow, whatdyathink")
Freude: Did you say something, sire...eh?
Jobert: Nope. So, what are you doing on that floor, some type of yoga?
Freude: Actually, sir, I was praying for joga but some wish-granter must be hard of hearing and don't know no crap cos they instead gave me this fullofshit, now I can't move, ahhhhhraiii!!!
Jobert: But I was told you had been walking atop that parapet since this morning and doing some ballet stuff and all that joke and talking in Latin to some of my co-workers.
Freude: Are you kidding me sir? I don't do ballet, thankyouverymuch, and latincrap what's that? And why the fathersfart would I walk atop that parapet, you think I'm crazy?
Jobert: Of course not, I think you're a smart kid. Hmmm, something's going on. Did somebody invite you to an EB?
Freude: Nobody. If they did send an invitation, I was not aware.
Jobert: So what were you doing while in that yoga position?
Freude: I was just thinking if I were dead because I felt so unalive I swear to my fathersfart, and since you talk to dead people, I am right now confirming that I am probably kaput, right sir?
Jobert: Cut the crap, join me in the EB downstairs.
Freude: I can't sir.
Jobert: But why?
Freude: I can't move. These feet don't know their way out.
Jobert: Don't worry, ultimately they will, I'll go down now and meet my other friends.
Freude: Like Godzilla.
Jobert: Sorry, I only do Mozilla.
Freude: Then, have a nice trip, sir, thankyouverymuch.
Jobert: Yo kid, it's 9:15 pm, I'm late and gotta go. May you live all the days of your life. And remember, do not just live, linger.
Freude: Yo sir, I'll remember that. Peace to all.

Jobert walks down the stairs, Freude staring at his direction. When he is gone from view, Freude stands up without effort, looks down the stairs and says, a la Denis Diderot, 'l esprit de l'escalier'. And then he heartily laughs, looks at us, winks, and winsomely smiles.

Lights on. Curtains down.

Postscript: Many times, silence speaks volumes compared to a mouthful of dialogue. We'll adhere to that and opt for silence to relay the event of the EB, the discussions, the resolutions, the Romans and the Romanovs, the KTVs and ESPs and BOIs and UPs and SGs and FJs and FPJs, the families and friends, everything and everyone...which in sum could be the pine tree, bequeathed to us in verse form by the poet Dan Pagis of Israel, translated from the Hebrew by Stephen Mitchell:

Conversation

Four talked about the pine tree. One defined it by genus, species, and variety. One assessed its disadvantages for the lumber industry. One quoted poems about pine trees in many languages. One took root, stretched out branches, and rustled.